After a whirlwind family wedding weekend in Las Vegas we decided to stay in Flagstaff over the Thanksgiving weekend. Besides, there was a big snow storm coming thru so staying home seemed like a wise choice. We didn’t feel like making Thanksgiving dinner but Paul has a colleague who is an excellent chef and baker so we wrangled an invitation to her house for Thanksgiving. She goes all out cooking and baking for the holiday and invites friends and neighbors who don’t have plans for the day thus, an orphan’s Thanksgiving. This means that every year there is a different mix of faces around the table which leads to interesting conversations and unexpected incidents; this year’s festivities were no exception!
We were the first to arrive and right out of the gate the host’s husband, who serves as the greeter and chef’s helper, tore his finger on a corkscrew making for a bloody mess and a disruption in cocktail service. Not deterred, he then went into his, to be expected, heckling of folks about their political leanings which one must either be prepared to defend or be able to successfully redirect the conversation. Over the years I have learned not to engage in this discussion and successfully diverted a kerfuffle on that front.
After our early arrival, the next guest to arrive was one of Paul’s academic colleagues who self identifies as an “old curmudgeon.” He spent the evening pontificating about past and present administrations at the college and discussing his plan to video his own demise when the time is right. I never did figure out what purpose that would serve. Finally, he droned on about his adventures making Lemoncello which, as a digestive, I only wish he had brought some to sample which would have been in high demand.
Next, the neighbor’s arrived which included a man pushing 90 who had had lower back surgery just three weeks ago. The last guest’s to arrive were two young men, one of whom makes vegan meats and cheeses and runs a vegan pizza shop. They brought an entire second meal with numerous dishes that needed to be heated in the microwave as the rest of the guests were served traditional fare. It seemed to me most of the dishes prepared by our host could have met their dietary needs and, if I had been the chef, I think I would have been insulted. Oh well…to each their own!
We all sat down and enjoyed a delicious meal after which folks started taking plates to the kitchen and assisting with clean up. As the elder gentleman got up from the table his legs gave out. Guests gathered around to assess and assist the man who was laid out flat next to the dining room table. As a stubborn German, he nixed his wife’s plan to call 911. Numerous attempts to get him up and out the door so he could go home to recover brought on painful screams so he was hauled back into the living room where he proceeded to pass out cold. He quickly came to and was finally brought upright. He eventually perked up and sauntered home with the assistance of his walker in a snowstorm. He may have headed off a trip to the ER but I bet he woke up the next morning beat up and bruised from all the manhandling the day prior…poor guy!
Things leveled out after that but I ended up using the folding chairs we brought as canes to avoid my own tumble on the wet slippery snow in the driveway. The good news is we brought home lots of leftovers which we thoroughly enjoyed the next day…without any drama! So, can your holiday stories top our “Crazy Orphan’s Thanksgiving?”